Christmas Song: “Can You Stop the Carvery?”

Brave Little Turkey Launches Heartfelt Christmas Appeal

Somewhere in Norfolk a brave little turkey managed to smuggle out a recording detailing exactly what she wants for Christmas. We don’t know if this plucky old bird made it out with her tape… but wherever she is, we salute her courage and decided to use it to try and do some good (we also hope she isn’t too offended by the terrible video we made for it).

Any proceeds go to Medicine Sans Frontier UK

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Can You Stop the Carvery?

Damn Bernard Matthews comes over here
To say we’re plumping splendidly
Now I’m quite afraid, in my little cage
Knowing I’ll soon be a dead turkey
Should have been born free, here’s my heartfelt plea:
Can you stop the carvery?

If I was an ape, I’d make a grand escape
These steel bars would not hold me
But life’s pretty tough, please don’t have me stuffed
Can you stop the carvery?

What is wrong with a great tofu?
Plenty of protein and good for you
My drum sticks are meant to run
Gobbling in the glorious sun

Turkey turkey drum drum
Turkey turkey drum
Turkey drum drum turkey drum
Turkey turkey drum
Turkey turkey drum drum
Turkey turkey drum
Turkey drum drum turkey drum
Turkey turkey drum

Wish I wasn’t food for Christmas

Tried to fake a cough, just can’t pull it off
Need Chinese ducks to kiss me
I’ll take bird flu over turkey stew
Left-overs sound so ugly
Need a get-out soon or I’ll be
I’ll be in a carvery

Turkey turkey drum drum
Turkey turkey drum
Turkey drum drum turkey drum
Turkey turkey drum
Turkey turkey drum drum
Turkey turkey drum
Turkey drum drum turkey drum
Turkey turkey drum

Wish I wasn’t food for Christmas

I’m a mess, I’m full of sores
Would love to roam in the outdoors
I’m so pumped full of steroids
I’m a meal you should avoid

Wish I wasn’t food for Christmas

I hope I make you sick

Comments

  1. Brilliant !

  2. I found it very amusing & entertaining!

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